Making headway...

Hooray, they're finished! For the last couple of weeks, I have been slowly making these little embellishments for some Christmas cards ... amongst other things, of course.

I've just got to print some cards and they're done! Felt courtesy of Sarah. I have just placed another order with her for some felt squares that I will be adding into a sewing box for my 3 nieces for Christmas, along with wool and knitting needles.

When I was young, I had 2 great-aunts who excelled in the Gentle Arts and who, I guess, instilled in me a love of domestic creativity. They were called Lily and Flossie and in their honour, I have named this pair after them! So, I am trying to pass on their legacy to the young ladies in my family! Not having daughters myself, I will try and pass on this appreciation to my nieces. Hope they like it! I do have another son who is now 11 and showing a tiny bit of interest in learning how to cook, so maybe I can pass something on to him too...

PS. don't these 2 look good with my new pointsettia?

Introducing...

Today I thought I should introduce another face in my family...

This is Barney! Also known as Lickle Tiny One! Or that ******** dog...!

He is a Border Terrier, 15 months old! As I type, he is sitting on my lap looking with interest at me tapping the keys. He smells good. Particularly behind his so-soft ears. He never smells bad. Unlike some other dogs we could mention... Another post, another day.

We were going to call him Merry, seeing as we already have a Pippin, but he just suited Barney. Then I found out George W Bush had a dog called Barney. I try not to hold it against him, Barney that is...

He's quite a naughty dog and has pushed me to a limit previously unknown in dog owning. But then in the evening, when he's sitting on my lap, I can forgive him anything. I am grateful to him for teaching Pippin (a chocolate lab) to be a dog and not a human. They play-fight alot, but are firm friends. Barney is a chilly dog and can usually be found nose up to a radiator during the colder months. He shivers from his morning excursion to the garden. It's an excuse to knit him cute little dog jumpers.

Splodge would have loved him as he could have fitted on his lap.

Photo catch-up...

I've had these photos ready to post for a week or so.

These are a couple of the stained glass pieces I made in the summer

I have a bit of a turtle thing going on in my downstairs loo(!), with some beautiful carved wall-hangings and an old map of Barbados, where I had the most amazing swim with some 4' leatherback turtles a few years ago. So this little one looks just right hanging in the window.

Meanwhile, back in the chicken house...still no eggs. Lily is now 22 weeks old, so should start laying any time. Or so I'm led to believe. She has got bright red wattles now, which is supposed to be a good sign too. They both love exploring the garden, hot on my heels when I'm out there.

They tuck into all our kitchen scraps, so I'm loving not throwing anything away anymore. After nearly 4 weeks, I still have one dog who is totally obsessed with them...

My workshop on Saturday was uplifting. It was really well thought out and the conversations were flowing and honest. I came away feeling as though the faith that I have in myself is a good thing. We talked about some pretty big questions concerning the World View... I wasn't really sure what exactly that was (still not fully comprehending, but hey...). Anyway, I met some lovely new people, was given a couple of new book titles (already ordered on Amazon!) and have signed up for a retreat!

Feeling the Fear...

I've decided the time has come to be honest and explain more of who I am. I've been putting off this post for what seems like weeks now. It's taken a lot of something in me to be able to get my fingers to type the words that need to come.

I know alot of bloggers have been reading Philip's blog. I stumbled upon it via Tracy's blog via goodness knows where ... like many of you I have been touched by his words, humbled by his courage in expressing his grief and smiled at his memories. It has touched a raw nerve...

You see the thing is this, last year - on Saturday 29th April at 11.15pm, to be precise - my darling little boy died. There, I've written the 'D' word... it's out. He was 12 but 2 weeks away from his 13th birthday. He was my eldest child and his last 9 years were a constant fight for survival, more of which, I guess, will be explained in later posts.

For the last 18 months, the internet has been a constant companion. The first few unbearable months were spent reading of untold sadness on sites devoted to bereaved parents. I felt like I had joined an exclusive club. After some time something in me altered and the negativity I was surrounding myself in was beginning to bother me. I couldn't bear to think that my whole life was going to be awful forever. Don't get me wrong; I have a sadness within me that knows no depths and my thoughts stray to my angel at any time, whether I'm ready for them or not.

So, there it is. The thing that now shapes my life. From the beginning I decided that this wasn't something I wanted to 'get over'. I knew from day one that my choice was to learn to live with my loss side-by-side, within me maybe. I think it was a good decision. Yes, I can function now. I can even laugh and smile. More than some people, I can find joy in simple things. And this is what keeps me going. The blogs I read are filled with things that interest me because they are filled with things that I, myself, like to do. It has been a revelation, this world of blogging. For me, it started innocently enough and now I have been able to find the courage to do what needs doing for my own sanity, and that is remember my beautiful boy whilst finding things to do with my time.

I hope I can find the right mix, so bear with me. Maybe one day, a photo will make it on here. The jury is still out on protecting our anonymity. I will call him Splodge, it was one of many nicknames! I haven't told a living soul that I do this. I need a place where I can be myself.

Here's something that I miss about Splodge - he had the softest hands imaginable, like butter. We used to tease him and say it was because he never did the washing-up!

I will end this post now with this: ever since he grew his wings and became an angel, every now and then a white feather appears in front of me. I take this to be a sign that I have a constant companion...

I feel quite exhausted now. Tomorrow I am off to a parents workshop about Spirituality in Bereavement. I am genuinely curious about faith but have no strong feelings either way. Maybe tomorrow I will feel more enlightened?

A New Craft...

Back in the summer, we stayed with a friend in Florida. She is a stained glass artist and is lucky enough to have her own studio at the house. During the daily Floridian downpour she tempted me into creating something out of glass. Within a couple of hours and after some elementary tuition, I was hooked.


Over the course of the 10 days spent with her, I made about 5 things - mainly suncatchers. If the sun comes out I will photograph them to post. When we got home I scoured the internet to find a local supplier of the tools and materials needed. My mind was buzzing with ideas. The trouble was, I already had a longish list of things that needed doing once we got home. It took lots of self-discipline not to rush straight out and buy all that was needed to start creating. I'd never worked with a 'hard' material before, but it's almost patchwork, just with a different medium. As with the other things I like to make, the best part is selecting colours and textures to create a wonderful end product.


Anyway, today was the day. So, off we went this morning to find Lead and Light. To say I was like a kid in a candy store is somewhat of an understatement and a tidy sum was spent indulging in my new hobby.


This is the kit you need to get started

And then you can go mad picking out your glass...

The colours and textures and fabulous

My first projects will be Christmas based. The photo's don't really do the glass much justice, but the pile at the top are beautiful, rich purples, violets and plums. A lot of the glass was in the sale bins so I felt justified in buying such a lot!

The thing is this... I need to get a work bench before I can get going. Another trip to Ikea then...